Random thoughts

I have 2 days left of work. I have had so many people come up to me and say how much happier I look. Apparently smiling will do that. My boss told me that if I need a job I am always welcome back. I just smiled. I am looking forward to the end of the torment. My poor heart has been so beaten up lately that I just need to get away from the torment and to just let it heal.

Healing takes time. Someone had told me that "this has gone on long enough" Well really, I need some time to heal and that healing is not going to take place if I am in the place of content reminders and wounding. I got razed pretty bad on Sunday and that set me back a bit.

Soldiers do not heal on the battle field, they get to go to the hospital. ( Sorry been watching Mash) Good thing Hope has a good "hospital". Lets leave the battlefield and let the healing begin!

I have been thinking about being a light at work and whether I was shining or not. Turns out I shone pretty good. I will miss the job but I am excited about what is around the corner.

A bunch of us are going canoeing this weekend and the weather sounds like it will not be raining! This is going to be the perfect celebration for the ending of my job.

I have ran into so many people that I have not seen in years. All in the past 3 days! A high school bud, missionaries that I used to support, people whose houses I sprayed and 2 people who I recognized from Briercrest. It is all very strange and I am wondering what I am supposed to take away from this. There are no coincidences, and this seems so strange. What is God trying to tell me? I think it has something to do with the past. Kindof like the time I got stuck in a rut, two Sundays in a row. I think God was saying that I was stuck in a rut.

I am glad that the Briercrest people did not know me well enough to ask if I married that guy I was dating. That makes it really awkward when I reply "Yep, married and divorced". I think I need to figure out a more tactful way to reply to that question. It is a little awkward though because Christians are not supposed to get divorced and I defend myself with flippancy and apathy. Maybe in this time of healing we can work on that as well.

I am enjoying life with my roommate. It has taken some time but I am enjoying her company and spending lots of time at home. I have stopped being passive aggressive and she seems to have relaxed a bit.. I had been bottling things up, only to let them explode and I have committed to stop doing that. This has made things much smoother. She is pretty cool.